Travel Plans…

So, here’s the deal people… WE KNOW. That’s right, dogs always know. My humans act so sneaky and stealth when they are getting ready to go on a trip. I will tell you the first tip off. My mom changes the sheets on the bed every Sunday, like clockwork. So, it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to know that when she does it on a Friday morning something is up. My mom likes to go into each week with clean sheets… don’t ask; I don’t get it either, give me good old grimy sheets any day. But I digress.

It starts with changing sheets on the wrong day. Then I see her rummaging deep into the closet behind the hang up clothes and out she comes with the overnight travel bags. This seals the deal. It is at this point in the process that I start to get cranky. Sheesh, why in the world do they have to go somewhere, don’t we have everything we need right here at home?

“Bax, it’s our anniversary weekend” she says. “Your Dad and I are getting away for a few days to celebrate!”

“Oh brother…this is more information than I care to know.” She proceeds to tell me that I am going to stay with Karen, which is a good deal for me. I love staying there. They really treat me like the king of the castle and I love that!

So, my mom scrambles around tidying the already clean house, because she doesn’t like coming home to chores… she remakes the bed, takes out all the trash, gathers her computer and packs the bags. I can tell she is really happy to be getting away. Apparently for humans, anniversaries are something special.

She loads me up in the car and off we go to Karen’s house. By this time, I’ve made the decision to be happy about it. After all, the way I choose to view each situation is up to me, right? I can focus on the negative, which would be a couple of nights out of my own king sized, pillow top Beauty Rest mattress, OR I can focus on spending a few days with Karen and her dogs, particularly Angel! I choose the latter and now that I’ve made that decision, I am starting to get enthusiastic about it all.

Happy anniversary humans! See you on Sunday.

 

Guard the House By Baxter Curtis Restine

 

…So, here’s something interesting; every time my mom leaves the house she says, “OK Bax, you guard the house, you’re in charge.”  Seriously, EVERY SINGLE TIME she leaves this is what she says!  Now I ask you, does she honestly think I don’t know that???  Does she REALLY think I need the reminder?

So, here’s how it usually goes.  As soon as she leaves I do a little walk about.  I start in the dining room.  From there I can see the front yard.  I check out the annoying deer.  If there are just a few in the yard I give a couple of semi-innocuous woofs just to let them know that I’m keeping an eye on them.  If there are more than a few, as is often the case, I bark like a fiend because they bug me…I let them know who’s boss.

After that I walk into the family room to see what’s on TV.  Yes; she leaves it on for me…usually on the cooking channel but occasionally on QVC, as if I’m really going to shop!  From the family room, I can see the pool and you know how I hate that pool!  It’s big and it’s wet… YUCK!

It’s about this time that I make my way upstairs to what the humans call the ‘billiard room’.  Why they call it a billiard room I don’t know…they haven’t had a pool table in over 7 years!  From the billiard room, I have a perfect perch from which to survey my empire.  I can see the pesky deer, the neighbors to the north and most importantly from my favorite spot in the sun on the back of the couch I can see the WHOLE length of the driveway so I know the precise moment the humans get home!

First, depending on which human it is, I see either the car or the truck pull in at the bottom of the driveway… I watch from the window until the instant they park and step out of the vehicle, then I race downstairs as fast as these short legs will go to meet them at the laundry room door, where my mom says, EVERY SINGLE TIME, “hey Bax, did you guard the house?”  Now really, sheesh… what does she think I was doing the entire time she was gone?